The last couple of weeks I have had a couple of experiences that made me so hopeful! The first was at the bug's parent-teacher conference. It really isn't anything big, but I left feeling so good! That is a rare thing leaving his parent-teacher conferences. His teacher was just showing me his progress, and it was good to see some goals passed off that he has been working on for a LONG time! Hooray! She also expressed how much she enjoyed him and told me that she thought we are good parents. I guess I feel sometimes with teachers that they look at me with him and think, "she has no idea how to handle that boy!" So it just felt good to hear it! So much of the time I feel like I have no idea what I am doing!
Then she shared with me what I have been hearing from several other sources that gives me so much hope! Just that in the next few years something is literally going to click for him, and he will be able to communicate. She said it is the most amazing thing to watch!
The next experience happened on a field trip for the bug. He has these two new aides in his classroom that are amazing! So positive and fun. The field trip was the first time I got to meet them. One of them actually has two boys of her own with autism. They are both teenagers now and mainstreamed! She just said that my son will be fine and echoed the same sentiments of his teacher saying it is just going to click. Her son was nonverbal at this stage too, and now is doing well. I asked if she did anything special and she told me that she learned all she could but the main thing she did is just loved them.
I feel like I am always searching for the "magic" thing that is going to help him, and when she said that I was elated! I can do that! With so many people out there talking about the magic window of time that you can save these kids sometimes it can be very discouraging. It makes me feel like I have missed the boat and couldn't save my son. But hearing this gives me courage and hope. He might not be "cured", but he will communicate!
I have been asked many times what will happen with the bug in the future and my response has been this. I don't know what he will be like at 12 or 18, all I can do is hope. I do know he will not always be like he is now. It won't always be this challenging. He has the capacity to communicate, it is so close. I can see it in the sparkle in his precious face.
oh my friend! I am so amazed at what a good job you do! I KNOW Matthew got sent to the best family any child with autism could hope to be sent to! You are amazing! I mean it! That sweet spirit will one day rise up and bless your names FOREVER! What he can't say now I am sure he will be making up for in the eternities on how wonderful a family he was blessed with! You really are my HERO! I admire your capacity to love and your level of patience and hope! I love reading your posts..they give me a good cry every time!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful post Heather!
ReplyDeletewhat a great post Heather. :) love reading about his stories and the progress that he is making. you truly are a wonderful mom! love you. :)
ReplyDeleteHeather I once had a very powerful "insight" planted into my head at a key moment in my despair, and you need to believe what I was taught that day--that YOU are the mother that Heavenly Father chose for Matthew. It wasn't a "settlement" when that baby was sent to you. He knew the challenges that His son would face in this life, and He trusted you to be the one to bring him home. He knows His daughter, and He loves His son. Don't ever doubt your gifts. You are the mother that Matthew needs. He is your stewardship because of your ability, not in spite of it. You are his mother by divine appointment. He needs you. Y-O-U. And you are doing your job exactly right. You're perfect for him. We love your sweetness and the love you show to all your children. Matthew is in good hands. I love what I see in you.
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